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What Is The Last Film You Watched? (Newer Films)


King Mark

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Godzilla. Its not very good. But its not the worst. The cinematic universe makes it less than could be.

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Aladdin (2019)

 

"We should have seen Godzilla." - Me

 

Live action Aladdin isn't an epic disaster or anything, but it's quite bad, inspiring one to doze off or contemplate leaving the theater. Why did they make this? Sure, money. But the more I ask this question on my increasingly infrequent trips to the theater, the more I demand more of an explanation. You can make money from a quality product too, you know. Do the people in charge of these massive productions even know what they're doing?

 

This movie is crap, make no mistake. They've taken a cartoon that, while perhaps not a great movie, was pretty good. It was endearing. It had memorable charming voice performances, music and animation. Remember the computer graphics when Aladdin is escaping the lava on the magic carpet? Still looks great. Remember Robin Williams in arguably one of the greatest roles in a cartoon flick? Sure, he's impossible to replace, but a tired boring Will Smith who once charmed us all in everything he did doesn't even try.

 

Let's just compare everything in that cartoon to this live action borefest. One is alive, vital. It owns itself. It demands your attention. It enchants you. It makes you laugh. It leaves you incredulous whenever Robin Williams says anything. Live action Aladdin is dark, boring...soulless. It's not simply manufactured by Disney to repackage a successful beloved movie in a new format and earn moolah. It's been put together by people that have absolutely no business producing such a movie. It's a snoozefest.

 

About 20 minutes in, I started to question who this movie was for. I already knew I didn't like it. It's too boring and talky for kids. But I was bored with all that stuff too, frankly. It's completely devoid of magic. There are a couple memorable bit roles that feel like they belong here, but the stars are less interesting than Algebra II at seven in the morning after staying up all night for most of its excruciating 2+ hour running time.

 

The vibrant animation has been replaced by drab uninteresting visuals, even in reinterpretations of iconic scenes like the Whole New World song. Many of the songs aren't even sung. Will Smith, an actual recording artist, is completely unsuited to the songs once masterfully performed by Robin Williams. The tone here is so wrong. There's no energy, no joy in anything. Memorable animal sidekicks have been replaced by atrocious animated versions that are also boring. The loveable oafish sultan from the original is now a dreary monotone guy who carries himself as though he needs the strongest antidepressant there is.

 

To me, the fakery and irrelevance of this movie is like opening the gates of Disneyland to guests and having nothing but Mickey faces plastered on everything in the park. We should expect nothing but the best from Disney. They're always on the cutting edge with the best shit, reminding us of their great legacy while taking us into the future with fresh content, thrilling and enchanting us like they always have. I might have even excused a completely out of place political statement where Jasmine very obviously calls out Trump supporters if the rest of the movie delivered what it should have. It hits absolutely no marks. It should have been sent to the cave of wonders for all eternity than theaters to dupe us moviegoers.

 

Recall how cartoon Jasmine distracted Jafar just like Vicki Vale pretending to go down on the Joker in a charming blatant ripoff from Batman. Like Vicki, Jasmine had good intentions. This phoney, nefarious movie pulls the Vicki Vale trick on us! And like the Joker once said while Batman and Vicki were hanging off the edge of the cathedral, they don't make 'em like they used to. Do they, eh? Eh, Batsy?

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Dumbo, Aladdin and The Lion King soon ... that's 3 Disney live-action remakes so far this year alone. I wonder how much of their back catalogue they intend to do this with? 

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A live action remake of Lady and the Tramp is also coming to Disney+ this year

 

They are probably going to get to all of them eventually

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Disney_live-action_remakes_of_animated_films

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23 hours ago, Jay said:

A live action remake of Lady and the Tramp is also coming to Disney+ this year

 

They are probably going to get to all of them eventually

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Disney_live-action_remakes_of_animated_films

Disney's Live Song of the South The16th Street Baptist Church Bombing. 

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Found Guardians Vol. 2 on Netflix the other day and had it on in the background while doing other stuff.

 

Fairly typical popcorn stuff with a plot I sort of lost, but Rocky and Groot were really funny. One of those cases where I noticed the songs way more than the score.

 

Highlight - that opening sequence with Groot dancing to Mr Blue Sky with mayhem in the background. Genius :D 

 

I reckon they could make a Groot movie. I was laughing so much at the escape scene, particularly when he drags the table in :lol:

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2 hours ago, Richard Penna said:

One of those cases where I noticed the songs way more than the score.

 

 

Especially this one was effective:

 

 

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The Inventor: Out for Blood in Silicon Valley

 

Oh come on, leave her alone. She's such a hottie. Wish she'd drop that fake deep voice though, it's just weird. She must have given all these blokes good head to invest in her dodgy product.

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The movie was very low key except for that gawd awful score. Not subtle in the least.

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3 hours ago, Fancyarcher said:

My Godzilla King of The Monsters review - Better late then never, I suppose.

 

https://dailyuv.com/980158

 

I also saw Rocketman last weekend, and it found to be quite delightful. My review as well.

 

https://dailyuv.com/980160

 

Screenshot_20190611-130132_Chrome.jpg

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Oof, that's bad.

 

Unfortunately I don't run the website, so I'm kinda stuck and complicated, when it comes to the regional locks. I'll have to check that out later, as my limited audience obviously doesn't skew very hard outside the U.S. 

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Really though, it's a bit wanky writing reviews for some obscure third party website, linking to them from here, and casually shrugging it off when it's pointed out that half the forum is geoblocked from seeing it.

 

Why not just repost them here, or does Fancyarcher receive kickbacks for clicks through this "dailyuv" service?

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Brightburn (2019) 

 

I didn't have any interest in seeing this film, but circumstances allowed it and so here we are:

It's disappointing, to cut a long review short. The 'What if Superman was evil?' premise is quickly plundered in Brightburn, because it doesn’t commit to either the superhero genre it’s supposedly subverting or the horror film trappings it is presented to us in. The biggest flaw the film presents for me is how we are experiencing this child’s dark and ultimately gruesome turn to the darkness through everyone but the child himself. This makes the point of view through which we follow the story primarily through the parents which creates this unfocused barrier between myself as a viewer, and being able to connect or sympathize with the main character. There are moments in the film where I think we could have benefited if we had been experiencing his transformation and emotional state at the same time he did, from his perspective. The fact James Gunn is attached to this is meaningless and the writing and directing are both equally voiceless in delivering style or substance. This whole film could've been handled much better and it's a shame that it took a simple premise and failed as both a superhero film and a horror film.

 

 

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It does not fail as a horror story. Its effective in a limited sense. The fact that people say it fails as a superhero movie is an unfortunate since Brandon never does anything heroic in the film. That is simple and to the point. He is evil. He has been sent to earth with bad intentions.

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I enjoyed the gore. It was over the top and refreshing. 

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It seemed excessive. I liked the corpse in the barn though, reminiscent of what David did to Shaw in Alien Covenant.

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I was thinking it was reminiscent of the scene in Silence of the Lambs. Either way i had gone into the film with minor expectations. So i was okay with the results. What happens to actor Matt Jones' character was hard to watch and yet I never took my eyes off of it. I probably should have gone and watch Booksmart with my otherhalf but I wasn't feeling that one.

 

Seeing this wasn't a total loss and it helps you appreciate the better films.

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On 4/1/2019 at 6:20 PM, KK said:

It's being hailed as a masterpiece. But my friend, who was really looking forward to it says it was pretty disappointing.

 

It is. Us is not scary, not funny, and has a concept that is hard to swallow. Ari 'Midsommar' Aster is our only hope now. 5/10 (because it's definitely watchable)

 

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I'm sorry you feel that way Joe, but those are real movies and should certainly be discussed here.  Sorry!

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12 minutes ago, Jay said:

I'm sorry you feel that way Joe, but those are real movies and should certainly be discussed here.  Sorry!

 

You don't think there's a difference between content made by streaming companies and content made by traditional networks and studios?

 

Hmmmm.....

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I never said there wasn't a difference, but the end result is it is still a movie.

 

Whether a new movie premieres in theaters, on a broadcast network channel, on a basic cable channel, on a premium cable channel, or on a streaming service, all of these movies can be discussed in this thread.

 

Sorry!

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47 minutes ago, Jay said:

I'm sorry you feel that way Joe, but those are real movies and should certainly be discussed here.  Sorry!

You are the moderator

8 minutes ago, The Original said:

Joe's a cinema snob. Thinks it's only a movie (a moving picture) if it exhibited inside a cinema.

And in that I am right. All you others who disagee are not.

 

Me being a cinema snob is no different than all you premimium channel snobs who look down om free tv.

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The Bold is a brave show in that it admits its a soap. GOT Chernobyl most ever show is without the beautiful people.

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