Movies you flicked off after five minutes

[Unlucky Bastard 7,782]

[A24 4,324]

I don't even begin to watch those!

[Sweeping Strings 2,342]

At first I read that as 'Movies you flicked off TO after five minutes', thought 'Ooh, a thread for the ladies' and then remembered that this forum is a sausage-fest. 

 

Move along, nothing to see here  .  

[Jurassic Shark 12,008]

9 hours ago, Thekthithm said:

 

 

Funny that you used a Scandinavian poster. Perhaps you didn't get into it because you didn't understand the subtitles?

[Unlucky Bastard 7,782]

14 minutes ago, Jurassic Shark said:

 

Funny that you used a Scandinavian poster. Perhaps you didn't get into it because you didn't understand the subtitles?

 

First decent rez image I picked off the search engine website.

[Holko 9,491]

That new but not newest IT thing. Though it's cheating because it may have been 10 minutes.

[Sweeping Strings 2,342]

It was admittedly more like half-an-hour to 45 minutes, but ... the original Red Dawn. Terrible film.  

[A24 4,324]

54 minutes ago, Holko said:

That new but not newest IT thing. Thogh it's cheating because it may have been 10 minutes.

 

You've seen the only good part, namely, the sewer part.

[Holko 9,491]

Well, it's not like I remember it.

[A24 4,324]

Cremeritis!

[Oomoog the Ecstatic 314]

Oh, so many movies, usually ones that people love. But I usually give them over 5 minutes.

[mrbellamy 6,270]

For whatever reason, Couples Retreat is the only one coming to mind. I think it actually was literally about 5 minutes. Not like I even thought it was especially bad, just mediocre enough to stir my apathy that night. 

[Nick Parker 3,040]

7 hours ago, Sweeping Strings said:

At first I read that as 'Movies you flicked off TO after five minutes', thought 'Ooh, a thread for the ladies' and then remembered that this forum is a sausage-fest. 

 

Move along, nothing to see here  .  

 

I didn't know sausage fest was recognized slang in Britain.

[mstrox 6,637]

I don't think I'd ever turn a movie off before it's over.

[Bayesian 1,353]

3 hours ago, Nick Parker said:

 

I didn't know sausage fest was recognized slang in Britain.

I don’t think any part of his post actually happened the way he says it. Sounds much more like a very lame and pointless attempt at gutter humor. And judging by the crickets so far, I bet I’m not alone in thinking that.

[Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488]

I somehow tolerated around a half hour of Ghostbusters (2016) flicking me off before flicking it off. 

[A24 4,324]

Jurassic World

[A24 4,324]

La La Land

[Oomoog the Ecstatic 314]

French films. After realizing the characters are saying things the least bit intelligible. You'd think they went to school to learn how to talk.

[Holko 9,491]

The first JJTrek. I needed 5-10 minutes to get enough of a generic modern non-trekky and not very appealing looking scifi. I think I shut it off when the supposed young Kirk was driving a car or something.

[Oomoog the Ecstatic 314]

The only problem I had with that movie was this

 

[Unlucky Bastard 7,782]

22 minutes ago, Holko said:

The first JJTrek. I needed 5-10 minutes to get enough of a generic modern non-trekky and not very appealing looking scifi. I think I shut it off when the supposed young Kirk was driving a car or something.

 

Mynameisjamessiberiuskirk!!

[Sweeping Strings 2,342]

13 hours ago, Bayesian said:

I don’t think any part of his post actually happened the way he says it. Sounds much more like a very lame and pointless attempt at gutter humor. And judging by the crickets so far, I bet I’m not alone in thinking that.

I don't know about crickets, but a certain 'Kockroach' seemed to like it. 

Another couple I have never made it through more than about half-an-hour of ... Superman IV (Cannon clearly thought they could do it on the cheap ... erm, no) and the '67 spoof version of Casino Royale (a chaotic production doesn't always show in the finished film, but it does here).

[TSMefford 1,509]

Alright, rant time.

 

I have never and will never do this. I have no right to talk trash about a film I have not seen. 

Too often is the line "I couldn't get through five minutes of it" used as an excuse to lend credence to saying that a film is bad. Bullshit. You can't say it's bad if you haven't seen the whole damn thing.

It's one thing if the film is clearly not your thing and you can tell from the beginning, but that doesn't make it bad.

 

*rant over*

 

All that being said, there are several movies I wish I did turn off/walk out of after 5 minutes, but I had no idea how bad they would be:

• Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (Theatrical and Ultimate Edition) - This one is probably still the worst big budget movie I've ever seen.
• Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist
• The Circle
• The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones
• Geostorm
• Death Note (Netflix Version)
• Lost River

Just a few, but I have actually seen them all the way through. Just wish I had not. Lol.

 

[mrbellamy 6,270]

31 minutes ago, TSMefford said:

I have never and will never do this. I have no right to talk trash about a film I have not seen. 

Too often is the line "I couldn't get through five minutes of it" used as an excuse to lend credence to saying that a film is bad. Bullshit. You can't say it's bad if you haven't seen the whole damn thing.

 

Well, it is possible to turn a movie off after 5 minutes and also not talk trash about it  

[Not Mr. Big 4,639]

1 hour ago, TSMefford said:

• The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones.

It isn't really fair to include a porno IMO.  Those aren't made to be "quality cinema" or anything

[TSMefford 1,509]

2 hours ago, Not Mr. Big said:

It isn't really fair to include a porno IMO.  Those aren't made to be "quality cinema" or anything

 

Lol. I think you’re being a bit insulting to pornos there my friend.

[Matt C 452]

I found myself falling asleep to Scorsese's The Aviator.

 

Transylmania was one I turned off five minutes in... it was aggressively NOT funny. I dare you guys to sit through more than 10 minutes of that dreck.

 

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle was a film I tapped out of 10 minutes in. A generic buddy comedy reunion with Dwayne Johnson and Kevin Hart? It didn't work and I was getting bored.

[Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488]

I actually saw Jumanji 2 in the theater. It was pretty lame and all I remember was the Scottish redhead from Doctor Who in short shorts.

[A24 4,324]

The Hobbit

[Matt C 452]

Tarantino movies also put me off 5 minutes in. His movies don't "click" for me, whatever that is.

 

The self-indulgent B&W opening segment in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, for example...

[Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488]

He doesn't do it for you, huh?

[Unlucky Bastard 7,782]

I'm not into them much either. I got told off once for it too.

[A24 4,324]

7 hours ago, Matt C said:

Tarantino movies also put me off 5 minutes in. His movies don't "click" for me, whatever that is.

 

The self-indulgent B&W opening segment in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, for example...

 

Tarantino probably loves Krull though ....

 

 

Perhaps he should do a remake.

[publicist 4,643]

With old Wu-Tang Clan remixes substituting the Horner score.

[Quintus 5,399]

Mamma Mia! 

 

And I'm an ABBA fan, but I couldn't tolerate this movie. 

[Matt C 452]

On 9/10/2019 at 1:34 AM, Alexcremers said:

 

Tarantino probably loves Krull though ....

 

 

Perhaps he should do a remake.

 

Tarantino's style doesn't work for me. 

 

He rips off filmmakers who are better than him (like Kurosawa), he dresses them up with snappy dialogue and bloody violence, and manages to convince Hollywood stars that he's the bees knees. 

 

Maybe if he gets that Star Trek movie in production, I'll see that. That might be crazy enough to work.

[Jay 37,250]

On 9/6/2019 at 2:58 PM, mstrox said:

I don't think I'd ever turn a movie off before it's over.

 

I agree with Ms Trox

[Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488]

Star Trek Beyond was on telly and I don't think I even lasted 5 minutes.

[Dixon Hill 4,232]

It's worse than most things but actually might be better than Into Darkness.

[Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488]

I just don't want to see people imitating the original series cast. Maybe it's the Gotham City in me. We just have a bad history of geeks dressed like Kirk.

[Docteur Qui 1,544]

Lincoln. Just wasn't in the mood for it. I'll try agin one day.

[A24 4,324]

[Sweeping Strings 2,342]

Bullet In The Head ... lasted about half-an-hour of this utterly generic Stallone actioner before giving up, just wasn't holding my interest at all. At least the Blu-Ray was going cheap.  

[A24 4,324]

[Kasey Kockroach 2,343]

On 9/7/2019 at 5:30 AM, Sweeping Strings said:

I don't know about crickets, but a certain 'Kockroach' seemed to like it. 

 

[Richard Penna 3,664]

MIB: International

 

Got through about 30 mins of it on the plane back from holiday before deciding it was just consisting of witty lines from Chris Hemsworth. I'm going to guess they paid him and Neeson a lot of money to do it.

[Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488]

It's just a figment of your imagination.

[Holko 9,491]

Oh, Fifth Element back when I tried it. It was just really unpleasant.

[Naïve Old Fart 9,488]

THE 5th ELEMENT is among the most unusually beautiful films, that I have ever seen.