FILM - John Carter

[Greg1138 3]

Well - it seems as though this film is destined for disaster...one figure I've read today states that Disney could lose $200,000,000 over this movie. Shame really - it's not actually as bad as some critics would have you think.

There are problems. It's too damn long, for starters. The subplot involving Edgar Rice Burroughs was entirely unnecessary, and seemed to be there just as a (lengthy) nod to the origins of the tale. I would happily have seen that 15 minutes go, in favour of a more satisfying ending to the inevitable final battle. The script is serviceable most of the time, but downright hysterical in others. The (far too long) exposition sequences I think would test the staying power of any backside, yet the action sequences are cut to the current "ADHD" standard rate of such segments....blink and you miss something (anyone planning on seeing this soon, a warning: try not to blink during the climactic battle). This results in a feeling that I am either watching two seperate movies inter-cut, or there are clearly two directors. Neither of which, of course, is the case.

There are good parts too: The acting is fine...nothing particularly memorable (Except Lynn Collins, naturally!!) but it's OK. The visual effects vary from excellent to downright astonishing (but...I mean...the blue stuff....what? What was the whole point? This is one exposition scene the film needed!). The plot, though convoluted in places (see above) - yeah, I get it. It's fine. The 3D is pretty-well done - I have to say, I was pretty surprised to find out that this was post-converted - although nothing really jumps out at you, which is a shame since, actually, you're not going to miss much in that respect just by waiting for the shiny disc.

I was just left a little non-plussed by the whole experience. I’ve tried to put my finger on exactly why, but I can’t. I’ve also read a lot of other reviews to see if they could figure out my problem with this film – unusually, they haven’t either.

Ultimately, I’m glad I saw it in the big screen – I have a feeling an awful lot is going to be lost on DVD/BR etc. That said, I’m not exactly going to rush out and buy it. Used copies will soon appear, and one of them will end up on my shelf – in the same section as “Krull” and “Beastmaster” – noble failures that aren’t really failures – they just didn’t get warmed to despite the good aspects. Both of these films have fervent cult followings, and I think this is where John Carter will ultimately find it’s biggest boost.

EDIT - you know what - I maybey should have mentioned the score....just maybe...but I'm going to suggest that NOT mentioning it is the best praise I can honestly give it.

[Richard P 5,302]

I agree that this has been unnecessarily savaged by many critics. It's not that bad - it's just got so many problems that unless you really get into the plot and enjoy it for what it is, you're going to have a problem later on.

My primary issue with the film is that I simply didn't care what happened to either John Carter or the girl. Neither performance was memorable to me, the dialogue was laughable at times, and the guy just didn't have any charisma or qualities that made me thing "yes, I'd rather like this guy to live to see another film".

Hence, when we got the to the arena scene, I was bored. had I not been in a cinema, I'd have switched the film off.

Also, the half-assed plot was making sense to me right up until the final battle, where there's some serious shapeshifting going on and I completely lost track of who was who's enemy and even which one was the real John Carter.

Points I agree with you on:

- Visual effects: incredible. At no point did I look at any of the creatures and think 'yes, that's CG'. I'm assuming a large portion of the budget went on these, and it was well spent.

- 3D - it felt a bit flat sometimes, but like you, I only discovered afterwards that it was converted. It's not a bad job.

Also, I did laugh a few times - the scene where the squishy thing kept catching up was amusing, and the repeated escape attempts in the jail cell were funny.

I think that if they recast the lead actors, cut the running time in half, and used some of the dialogue to explain more things (I didn't understand that blue stuff at all), it could've been a good film.