Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Just as I was about to cancel my useless subscription, these classic teddy bear Films, Movies if you will, shall soon be Content available to stream on the Wokest of Streaming Services. But I can't help but think...what will be changed? Clearly, these movies are now Problematic. They're products of the White Patriarchy and portray women as weak and always needing to be saved by male teddy bears and Wilford Brimley. The second movie also opens with the entire family being killed, which is far too disturbing for coddled modern audiences who enjoy incestual porn on the internet and live with their parents until they're 40, having become full fledged members of Antifa and aspiring to one day become a manager at Starbucks. It even has Ewoks in cages, evoking memories of slavery. Clearly, these need a content warning. Also, what are you drinking tonight? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bellosh 3,419 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 the monster in Caravan of Courage scared the shit out of me when I was little. i just had coffee actually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unlucky Bastard 7,782 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 The Giant Gorax sounds very Dr Seuss... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 17, 2021 Author Share Posted March 17, 2021 Uh oh! Caravan of Cancelation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mstrox 6,651 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 We just watched Battle for Endor on DVD tonight. P. Fun. Wonder if D+ will use the same transfer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A24 4,345 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 I saved my kid from watching that trash. Unlucky Bastard 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naïve Old Fart 9,550 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 ...and the Conscientious Dad Of The Year award, goes to... Spoiler Alex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A24 4,345 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 I did allow him to see the Prequels though ... and he became a fan. Yavar Moradi 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Naïve Old Fart 9,550 Posted March 17, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted March 17, 2021 ...and the Bastard Dad Of All Time award, goes to... Spoiler Alex Raiders of the SoundtrArk, Yavar Moradi, Edmilson and 1 other 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A24 4,345 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor 7,515 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 "Ewoke"....that's clever. I have a soft spot for these movies, in all their silliness. If memory serves, they were screened on Norwegian TV2 in the 90s - either as matinees or late-night viewing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raiders of the SoundtrArk 2,433 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Me after this news: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unlucky Bastard 7,782 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 As a kid, I saw Caravan of Courage before I saw Return of the Jedi. I was surprised to see Ewoks in a Star Wars movie. Gruesome Son of a Bitch 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raiders of the SoundtrArk 2,433 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 54 minutes ago, The Big Man said: As a kid, I saw Caravan of Courage before I saw Return of the Jedi. I was surprised to see Ewoks in a Star Wars movie. Poor you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay 37,370 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Ive never seen either of these flicks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 17, 2021 Author Share Posted March 17, 2021 4 minutes ago, Jay said: Ive never seen either of these flicks What the hell have you seen? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay 37,370 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 More movies than you have Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 17, 2021 Author Share Posted March 17, 2021 Nothing good it seems Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unlucky Bastard 7,782 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 16 minutes ago, Jay said: More movies than you have Doubtful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay 37,370 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 You think it's doubtful than I've seen more movies than Justin has? I'm building my Letterboxd page, I'll share it when it's done I've seen at least 2,000 different movies for sure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crumbs 14,318 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Apparently the cartoon segment from the Star Wars Holiday Special (with the first screen appearance of Boba Fett) is also coming to D+... just not the rest of it! But that means the master copy of the Holiday Special still exists somewhere... and they're just refusing to release it. Poor Bea Arthur and her Cantina songs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disco Stu 15,495 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 I haven't seen Battle for Endor since I watched it with my scout troop in 5th grade, and I've never seen Caravan of Courage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unlucky Bastard 7,782 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 3 minutes ago, Jay said: I've seen at least 2,000 different movies for sure So have I! And I mean it. I counted all mine in an Excel file because I was bored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manakin Skywalker 4,897 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 18 minutes ago, crumbs said: But that means the master copy of the Holiday Special still exists somewhere... and they're just refusing to release it. Poor Bea Arthur and her Cantina songs. It was a different master I think, they just inserted it into the special originally and chopped it in half. The cartoon was released in HD on the 2011 Blu-ray set, so that at least was restorable. Whether the rest of the special still exists or is in decent shape I have no idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A24 4,345 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 1 hour ago, The Big Man said: Doubtful! Don't forget, Jay is a genuine couch potato. Every evening he watches a TV series or two and a movie. I only watch one episode in the evening and a movie when it's the weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay 37,370 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Alex is incorrect in his assessment, as always Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manakin Skywalker 4,897 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 I did a restoration of both films a few years ago and was planning on redoing them at some point. I doubt they'll be using new scans for the D+ version anyway, likely just the 480p DVD transfers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naïve Old Fart 9,550 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Both Ewoke movies are bollocks, but, strangely, they are both better than WILLOW. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor 7,515 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 6 minutes ago, Naïve Old Fart said: Both Ewoke movies are bollocks, but, strangely, they are both better than WILLOW. Hey, hey...no need to diss WILLOW. I've always felt that is an underrated film. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naïve Old Fart 9,550 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Eh! Eh! Eh! Cairm down! Cairm down! It's only one man's opinion, of one film, Thor. It's "nothing to get hung about". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor 7,515 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Ha, ha. I know. I was being tongue-in-cheek. Had the movie on VHS once; don't know what happened to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manakin Skywalker 4,897 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datameister 2,044 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 14 hours ago, Gruesome Son of a Bitch said: Just as I was about to cancel my useless subscription, these classic teddy bear Films, Movies if you will, shall soon be Content available to stream on the Wokest of Streaming Services. But I can't help but think...what will be changed? Clearly, these movies are now Problematic. They're products of the White Patriarchy and portray women as weak and always needing to be saved by male teddy bears and Wilford Brimley. The second movie also opens with the entire family being killed, which is far too disturbing for coddled modern audiences who enjoy incestual porn on the internet and live with their parents until they're 40, having become full fledged members of Antifa and aspiring to one day become a manager at Starbucks. It even has Ewoks in cages, evoking memories of slavery. Clearly, these need a content warning. Also, what are you drinking tonight? Come now. If you're going to lampoon people who care about other people or companies that admit their mistakes, you could at least be clever about it. Disney was actually pretty late to the acknowledging-hurtful-moments-in-older-stories party. Warner Bros. has had content warnings like these on some of their cartoons for years, and rightly so. Anyway, I've never seen most of this more obscure Star Wars stuff, though I've of course heard about it for decades. Might give it a shot once it's up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 17, 2021 Author Share Posted March 17, 2021 Do you need a Leonard Maltin introduction? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datameister 2,044 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 2 minutes ago, Gruesome Son of a Bitch said: Do you need a Leonard Maltin introduction? ...no? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naïve Old Fart 9,550 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 1 hour ago, Thor said: Ha, ha. I know. I was being tongue-in-cheek. Had the movie on VHS once; don't know what happened to it. You upgraded to 4K Ultra HD Blu? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pellaeon 593 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 We have Walt Disney Treasures - The Chronological Donald, Volume Two which has a bunch of great WW2 cartoons on it in a special “vault” menu, but if you want to access them you have to play Leonard Maltin for about 4 minutes. You can’t fast forward it! Anyway, Ewoks, delightful movies! Best watched as children (or with children). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mstrox 6,651 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Caravan of Courage and Battle for Endor are two very different movies. Caravan of Courage is paced a bit like Willow - a leisurely journey across Endor with setpieces here and there. Battle for Endor is pretty nonstop chase action, except for a brief interlude when they introduce Wilford Brimley. I own all of the 4/2 Disney+ additions on disc, so I’m most interested in Ewok(e)s seasons 1-2, which have not ever been released as such since they aired. I don’t understand restricting what your kid watches just because you don’t like it! They’re gonna end up their own person, so I let mine watch the Ewok movies and the prequels (minus ROTS, for now - just due to the intensity) and let them make up their own mind. Jason may have seen more movies than Justin, but Justin has definitely seen Independence Day more than Jason. Raiders of the SoundtrArk 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 17, 2021 Author Share Posted March 17, 2021 It's just better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A24 4,345 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 44 minutes ago, mstrox said: I don’t understand restricting what your kid watches just because you don’t like it! They’re gonna end up their own person, so I let mine watch the Ewok movies and the prequels (minus ROTS, for now - just due to the intensity) and let them make up their own mind. Be careful, you are what you watch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mstrox 6,651 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 Well then consider me a BOSS BABY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthDementous 1,059 Posted March 17, 2021 Share Posted March 17, 2021 It’s going to be really funny when these do eventually release and they’re completely unaltered. Disney aren’t ‘woke’, they just pay lip service to the idea of it so they attract that audience. Modifying an obscure kid’s film from the 80s is far more effort than that lip service warrants Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gruesome Son of a Bitch 6,488 Posted March 18, 2021 Author Share Posted March 18, 2021 Look, I was drunk when I posted this. I don't really think they'll alter the Ewok movies or slap a disclaimer or Leonard Maltin introduction in front. 2 hours ago, DarthDementous said: Disney aren’t ‘woke’, they just pay lip service to the idea of it so they attract that audience. Yes, they certainly know how to play to their audience and that includes China, where they don't bother with any of the Woke Disney. DarthDementous 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unlucky Bastard 7,782 Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 Disney is eager to attract the blue-haired, genderless warlords from CHAZ sorts. Gruesome Son of a Bitch 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chen G. 3,950 Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 20 hours ago, Disco Stu said: I've never seen Caravan of Courage. It’s basically a dry-run for Willow. Curiously enough, “Caravan of Courage” is an exercise in George Lucas rewriting history a-la A New Hope. Originally, it was just “An Ewok Adventure”... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarthDementous 1,059 Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 11 hours ago, Gruesome Son of a Bitch said: Look, I was drunk when I posted this. I don't really think they'll alter the Ewok movies or slap a disclaimer or Leonard Maltin introduction in front. Yes, they certainly know how to play to their audience and that includes China, where they don't bother with any of the Woke Disney. Haha, fair enough Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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